i worked my ass off the past 2 years. i passed my boards with a lot of hard work and focus. i thought i could enjoy this all when i was done but here i am, a ball of stress and nerves. jumping from stressing about one thing to the next.

i am struggling to find myself again.  i didn’t think it would apply to me, but i think in the last few months of nursing school, i did lose myself. i lost what drove me as a person, as a feeling emotional thinking person. it wasn’t just nursing school. it was also the drama and tribulations from the world/scene i was a part of. and now, i just want to shrug it all off. leave that world behind.

but because my self has been so intertwined in that world, i dont know how much of ME too, i am shrugging off. leaving me a husk of my former self.

so transformation is change, abrupt new change, shedding. i shedded. but i put on a new outfit that reflects concerns i barely care or give or shit about deep down. that needs shedding too.