rewind.

see that 4 liner intro below? that was me, 2007, in a new city with the comrades, fresh out of school, heart beating with so much excitement about our political projects. around us was (and still is) war subtle at times and brutal in others. but i had found a sense of purpose. outdoing myself, that game that i played. solo. just me and my desire to prove to myself i could, and i fuckin’ would. i was sprinting, away from those voices in my head that had been uttered, audibly or silently, by those arrogant mostly white faces that had dotted my youth. that condescending sideway glance, that smirk, or that look that saw through me effortlessly because to them, i was that simple, or boring, to read, so absolutely predictable like the many millions i represented: we didn’t matter. trampled dignity, needing resurrection. so then now, i would pour heart and soul. prove myself i could and i would. and i enjoyed it.

*

so then we fast forward.

and the tape gets stuck. now it’s one of those times when you remove the cassette from the player and stick your pencil (make sure it’s the right size!) into that hole, and turn. turn, turn over that crease, that fold, till you straighten out that thin black film.

but sometimes, in that fervent, impatient desire to hear the music play, you can inadvertently, accidentally, break that fragile film. turn too hard, film creases more, and then, snap.

and so, between 2007 and now, there is a break, that is at once jarring and that is also at once refreshing. and here i am. another year in this city, still new to me, still curious, where some corners hold memories that sting.

this is not a new beginning. more of a segue in, to more living.

*

a new blog is like a new beginning. this is my 2nd new beginning. moving to seattle, trying to set up a new home, trying to be consistent with my writing, trying not to slack off with life cos it catches up with you later, keeping the faith here for a world with justice, love and compassion. this is yet, another stage in this life.